He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
you never un-have a 4some
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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