Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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