DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
