You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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