last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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