Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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