we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
