Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
