So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
