if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
