i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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