No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
