A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
