wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
