yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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