Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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