I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
