so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
