Walk of Shame. In a state park.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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