Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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