hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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