How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
i think my cat just said my name.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Randomize
