I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize