I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize