hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize