I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
