it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
