he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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