Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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