Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
