He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Randomize
