I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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