If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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