this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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