Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Lo siento on account of my penis...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize