what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
