East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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