thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
