Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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