She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
