It's Friday. Sex?
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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