I like to think it a success when the cops are called
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm at about main and main street
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
