Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
