I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
