you guys were way drunker than both of me
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Your cock deserves a montage
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Randomize