Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
