You smell like stripper and shame
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
