You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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