Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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