im drinking this country out of the recession.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
