he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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